Positive negatives.

I realized this week that I suck at golf.

But, this was one of the best things that has happened to my game in the better part of a month. It has completely changed my outlook and helped me to get back to the basics of why I am out there, as well as let me stop worrying about scoring for the time being.

There are plenty (I think) of sports psychologists who would probably say that thinking this way is a negative, but in all honesty it has refreshed the mental side of my game. By positing that I am currently not a good golfer (and shouldn’t be) I can let bad shots roll off my back. I will not dismiss them, but instead have an understanding that this happens and think about what went wrong in the swing.

Earlier in the week I played a match with Allison Hanna, an LPGA golfer who practices out at Columbia Edgewater. I see her quite a bit out there and we had been chatting about hitting on the par 3 course for a few weeks. I was super excited about the chance to play against someone who plays for a living and went into our game a bit too hungry. I wanted it so bad that I started hitting tight and conservative type of shots which are completely different than anything I practice. Needless to say, she absolutely destroyed me (unless you sum up the absolute values of your strokes away from par; in that case we tied.). I wanted to play so bad that I shot the worse score I’ve ever hit out there, typical.

Later in the week, I played with a threesome I previously had not met. Again, I wanted to play really well and entered “knowing” that I could shoot under par. After shanking the second tee shot I got frustrated with myself, wondering how I could hit such a poor stroke. The rest of that round was all about way over-thinking my mechanics and paralyzing myself on the tees. Again, I shot a bad score. It was a score I hadn’t hit in months and led to an evening of consuming chorizo burritos with ice cream chasers and a long contemplation of how I’ve come to this level.

That’s when I realized that I suck at golf. We all suck at golf. That’s why we practice, why we come back, why it’s so impressive to watch one of the few humans who doesn’t suck at golf. Golf is not an easy game, but it’s based on the simplest concept in gaming history: hit a stationary ball into a hole. Simple, beautiful and universal. But, it’s this simplicity that leads to frustrations when we do not perform to our expectations. Frustration can lead to burnout, which is the single most threatening force in a project like The Dan Plan. For the next while, I will understand that I occasionally hit a shot wide left, fat, thin, topped, etc and instead of shutting down just say: “It’s okay, we’re learning here, you can still suck at golf.”

However… This is not something that will or can stick with you. There are certain phases and ages of experience where you can safely allow yourself a bit of suckitude leeway, but if I’m saying this a couple of years from now all will be lost. Currently, my game is in construction mode and there is still so much to learn and improve on. My new mental approach is to accept the fact that I have only played golf since the beginning of this year (starting at 40 yards) and that I am in it for the long haul. there will be good months and bad months and as long as you can learn something every day you’ll win the fight eventually.

This week, I also got a brand new set of wedges, an 8-iron, 6-iron, 3-hybrid and driver. I’m not allowed (of course) to use the 3-hybrid or driver yet, but LOVE the new wedges and irons. Thank you Nike Golf and in particular Jeff for taking time to do a club fitting with me, it was one of the best golfing experiences I’ve had to date and would strongly recommend anyone who’s serious about golf to go and get fit for clubs. Having the right tools makes a world of difference!

pic of new clubs:

And one more for good measure: they even have my initials stamped on them (so pro)

What a wonderful world!

31 Responses to "Positive negatives."

Justin says:

July 28, 2011 at 9:43 am

Great lesson to learn, its kindof funny how you had to achieve that success before a little more failure threw you off. Training mentally can be just as important and its good to start now so when you start playing tournaments and stuff like that you have the mental fortitude to shake off one bad shot, which happens to all the best players. It sounds like setting up rounds with people who play competitively or with anyone you want to impress you could you a lot with that aspect. And once you play well in that situation once, the rest should start to come much easier.

Good Luck Dan!!
Juan says:

July 28, 2011 at 4:31 pm

As Bobby Jones once said, there is a difference between golf and tournament golf. From my experience one has to learn to play under pressure… it is REALLY different than practicing, and playing with friends,even if there is a small bet. Playing under pressure develops mental toughness which is a skill of its own. As my coach taught me there are Physical Fitness, Golf Technique (the skills of hittting the shots), Course Management and the Mental Aspects of golf — all need serious attention if you want to become a serious golfer.

Keep working and suckitude will be come phenomenalitude!!

Your fan Juan
Charlie says:

July 28, 2011 at 6:42 pm

1) As to your first line, Welcome to our game.

2) I hope you’ll use your photo skills to take a large close-up of the face of your new clubs so that you can create a side-by-side comparison down the road. Even better, if you’re seeking ways to your former pursuit with your current one, you could capture an image of a club every day and create a time-lapse video of the inexorable aging process…
Linda says:

July 29, 2011 at 9:05 am

Great blog entry! Too many people/athletes/kid athletes think that once they did something well once, that they have become masters of said particular skill/shot/move, and egos get inflated, and the practice stops. When in reality, this is when actual practice begins.
I guess it’s always best to go into a round trying to just beat yourself, and not the other players?

I work with young hockey athletes – and sometimes when these kids get really good and don’t experience a lot of competition from their peers locally, I think the best thing for them would be to play against some very skilled same-aged players from Canada or Europe to get them back into the mentality that they still have a lot to learn and a lot of hard work ahead of them. It’s sad to see cocky 12 year olds, knowing that if they keep up w/ that attitude, they won’t reach far.
Best of luck!
Geoff says:

July 29, 2011 at 8:54 pm

“We all suck at golf. That’s why we practice, why we come back, why it’s so impressive to watch one of the few humans who doesn’t suck at golf.”

No we all don’t suck at golf mate. The quantum step you have made is begin to voice your burgeoning “Golf Ethos”. We all have one that is created from our experience in the game. Some people have a parrot fashion recital of a PGA Champions words, others have a short statement on the game and many have an unspoken opus in the mind every time the clubs are touched or the game is thought about.

Mine is simple to me as I have lived it and written it, yet to speak it is not a brief dialogue. The short version for mine is , “I am not the best golfer, I am the best I can be.”

I have used a motto of getting the positives out of the negatives since 1983 and a motor vehicle accident. This works for me and is a great way to let your mind work unencumbered.

have a great weekend and hit ‘em straight.
Ben says:

July 30, 2011 at 7:27 am

I love the position you’ve taken with “we all suck at golf”. I play a lot of competitive bridge; as it happens I won a national championship just yesterday. I mention that so you can appreciate my perspective when I say that we all suck at bridge. In bridge and golf, absolute perfection is achievable only briefly, like hitting a hole in one.

Like anything, minimising your mistakes at bridge is important, but more important I think is just being comfortable with the fact that you are going to make a large number of “mistakes”.

You know you are in the zone when you consistently play “in the moment”. You can’t change the past; the only thing you can control is what you do right now, so focus everything you have on doing that as well as you can. We’re lucky in bridge and golf that we have the opportunity to step back, focus, and only then step forward to make our play/shot.

Best of luck Dan, I’m full of admiration for what you’re doing.
John says:

July 31, 2011 at 6:42 pm

Dan,

While I am happy to read that your shotmaking is improving, I am much more impressed with your attitude. You have shown determination in the face of suckitude and seem to have maintained a positive view of the world. That is one characteristic that can’t be taught; you either have it or you don’t.

The repeated references to Zen philosophy are worth noting. Living in the moment, giving up the illusion of control, etc. are concepts that work for your whole life, not just out on the course.

You are doing an amazing thing. Keep it going.
John
Bruce says:

August 1, 2011 at 3:47 am

Hey Dan! You’re quite correct when you say we all suck at golf. I’m sure by now you have watched enough golf tournaments to see the pros make mistakes and hence in their eyes they “suck”. The thing about this game is that the goal posts just move. The direction towards lower scores is NOT always the right direction. Sometimes you MUST suck to reach the next plateau. You have to learn to fail and accept it as either a learning experience or just a total freak shot that can be dismissed. If you carry on and repeat the mistake for that round then obviously you need to go find out why and how to fix it. Learning. I don’t know if you are tracking your scores but try not to worry about them too much week to week. They can be good for tracking long term patterns and general weaknesses though, like how weather affects your play. How seasonal changes affect your mental state. These will obviously be used as lessons learnt NOT excuses.

You rock Dan and you WILL succeed in your quest I have no doubt.

Committed fan

Bruce (New Zealand)
Dan Fan says:

August 2, 2011 at 12:25 pm

“The temptation to quit will be greatest just before you are about to succeed.”
williamevanl says:

August 2, 2011 at 8:58 pm

Nearly 20% through this now… Just my opinion but I would expect someone at 2000 hours of golf to know if they were going to go on to hit a prodigy like level of skill at 2000 hours.

*at this stage in my life I hate to be a negative nancy* I think given my recent career change that I can give anecdotal info that supports this belief.

In this outliers, practice vs talent, 10,000 hours of practice ideology people are assume to be pretty equal. I’ve heard computer programmers are a good example of this as it takes about 10,000 hours for them to become/feel truly competent at what they do.

Well it just so happens that a co-worker and I were moved into computer programming positions at my company because we were the most technologically savy people in our group, the language was propietary and people needed to be trained anyway. Although I had zero professional experience in programming I had probably several 1000′s of hours of experience with programming as a hobby. *writing basic as a 10 year old and assembly at 13, c++ and finally c#*

My co-worker had very little experience but seemed to have a knack for simple macros, scripts etc.. You would think that we would progress about equally but that I would have a jump start over him by several months, maybe even years.

But here’s the deal, we have been in this position for about six months now and he is outpacing me by huge margins. He probably caught up to me in a couple months! It is obviuos to me that he is moving at about 90 mph and I’m moving along at 30 mph and I can’t just work harder or longer. He is the equivalent of a prodigy in programming, he has figured out things in this language that even the creators dont quite understand.

He’s not spending 1000′s of hours brute force learning more than everyone else, he just is learning at a pace that nobody else can touch. He’s like a kid that you teach the times tables to and in a couple of weeks they can tell you what 23423454225X345344534 is, or someone that picks up a musical instrument and reaches virtuoso levels of skill in less than a year.

In any case, it’s cool to watch, almost outerwordly and it’s not just working extra hard for extra long it’s prodigy like talent.
Anton Clijsters says:

August 3, 2011 at 1:41 am

Hi Dan,

Great philosophy you’re applying there … keep of the pressure for now :)). As you I also can get quite frustrated from time to time when I play poor shots, but I can also be extremely satisfied when the ball does exactly what I want it to do, and those shots I remember the longest :)).

Keep u the good work,

Anton
Aaron says:

August 3, 2011 at 7:35 am

I’ve been following your blog for a while now, but I’m not a golfer. I’m a Neuroscience and Psychology student in MI and have been a big proponent of the deliberate practice bandwagon since reading some of the books that came out in 2009. One thing that I would like to add about practice is this: you could also practice your outlook through some mental conditioning before you hit the links. I’m not talking about hypnosis or any voodoo meditation, just simply practicing letting go of any outcome other than being completely in the moment.

Like perfecting your swing, you need repetition to make your mental responses just as automatic. So practicing letting go of the need to be perfect, and when you finally come to a situation like playing against a pro, when you feel yourself tightening up you can just pause for a moment and let go of the pressure. Practice whenever you can, it takes just a couple seconds to imagine walking up to the tee, feeling that tightness coming on, then take a deep breath and let all the need to be perfect go, and let your mechanics take over.
dan says:

August 3, 2011 at 7:43 am

HI Justin,

Very true, you have to put yourself in the situations that you want to be successful in. If you train your entire career by yourself and then want to perform in front of people it just won’t work out (most likely). Thanks for the comment and for reading along!
dan says:

August 3, 2011 at 7:48 am

Juan,

I like that: phenomenalitude. Nice!

I try and get as much “competitive” experience as I can and from here on out I will take advantage of every chance I can get to play in a competitive field. It was a bit hard at first as I was only putting, but now that I’m moving further and further out it is starting to become more possible.

Thanks for continuing to read and support the plan!
dan says:

August 3, 2011 at 7:49 am

HI Charlie,

That’s a good idea. I didn’t do that with my first set of wedges, but should with these new beauties. I could take a shot once every couple weeks showing the progression of wear. I love it!
dan says:

August 3, 2011 at 7:51 am

Linda,

That is some wonderful insight that you have noticed. It’s interesting how sometimes the one’s who seem to “get it” quickest are the first to get passed once everyone else (who have put in the hard hours) start to catch up. A great example of how hard work gets you to where you want to go in the long run.

Thank you for the comment!
dan says:

August 3, 2011 at 7:54 am

Geoff,

You are right, a good mantra is a powerful force. Mine is not “I suck at golf” rather more along the lines of: “I KNOW I can do this” and every day when I wake up that is the first thing I think. Realizing that “I suck at golf” is more of a way for me to remember to keep an open mind and not let frustration get in the way of my progress.

Keep it up and be the best you can be!

Dan
dan says:

August 3, 2011 at 7:56 am

Ben,

Congratulations on winning the national bridge championship!! that’s huge! My family is pretty big bridge players and I know the game a bit, at least enough to know that there is a lot more to it than just a card game, it’s a wonderfully challenging mental pursuit.

I love the comparisons with golf and bridge, both really are about minimizing your “mistakes.”

Congrats again and have a great one,

Dan
dan says:

August 3, 2011 at 8:12 am

John,

Thanks for the comment, it’s very encouraging. Perhaps I need to read more Zen philosophy.. The mental side is so important, so anything that will help!
dan says:

August 3, 2011 at 8:16 am

Hi Bruce!

and, hello to New Zealand!

There is nothing more frustrating than not being able to repeat something that you know you can do, but at the same time I have come to terms with this and the ebbs and flows that come with the process of learning. There are times when we all have sucked at whatever we currently do, it’s just what comes with taking on a new task.

I do track my scores, but don’t put too much emphasis on the day to day patterns, it’s really month to month and sometimes quarter to quarter that really show the important data. And, as long as you continue to learn you will continue to improve and that’s what’s important. You are right on.

Cheers for following along and for the comment!

Dan
dan says:

August 3, 2011 at 8:21 am

Hi William,

I’m not sure of your or your coworkers aptitude and study habits, but I would be curious as to how much time he is putting in in the evenings compared with you? Do you think that he goes home and is studying this code? Are you spending a lot of extra time on it? Wish I knew more about the situation, but at any rate, perhaps he might master this in 8,000 hours and it could take the next person 12,000.. There is no hard and fast number, but more of a general average of what it takes to become great at any specific field..

Definitely not a “negative Nancy” and I appreciate the comment!

Dan
dan says:

August 3, 2011 at 8:22 am

Thank you Anton and keep up the good work!
dan says:

August 3, 2011 at 8:27 am

Hello Aaron,

This sounds like a great addition to my practice and as I’m heading out the door right now I will incorporate it into today’s practice. I’m actually playing 9 holes with three people I haven’t played with before, so it will be interesting to try and let go, see how it works!

Thanks for following along and let me know if you have any other suggestions.

Cheers,
Dan
Tony says:

August 3, 2011 at 6:35 pm

I’ve shot an 85, 95 and 105 this week. I hate this game.
Sebastian says:

August 3, 2011 at 8:32 pm

Made me laugh! Cheers for the reminder that patience yields some of the best results and that the next step is the most important one to focus on. (See how I didn’t say worry about?!)
dan says:

August 3, 2011 at 10:12 pm

Tony,

I hear you! what a game…
dan says:

August 3, 2011 at 10:12 pm

Any time Sebastian. Good to hear from you and thanks for continuing to read the blog
John says:

August 12, 2011 at 7:14 am

Dan,

This is a cool blog that you might find useful. zenhabits.net

jwc
dan says:

August 15, 2011 at 8:29 am

Hi John,

Nice blog, I definitely am in need of “being in the moment” more. I think we could all benefit from a little zen concentration…
Visa says:

August 16, 2011 at 12:14 am

Hello Dan,

I found this adventure of yours I think a month ago, when some Finnish newspaper wrote a short story about it. I’ve been reading your blog and everything else written about you ever since.

I just want to say that your perseverance and winning attitude is a huge inspiration for me (as it should be for everyone, I might add). I fully believe that you can achieve the necessary skill set through deliberate practice. However, I’m afraid that the mental side will be the more challenging side to be achieved. Though given your courage to jump into this, you’ll probably master that as well.

I’ll remain as your supporter through the following year and wish you all the best!
dan says:

August 17, 2011 at 11:15 am

Visa,

Thank you for the comment and cheers for finding the project. Who knew it would make it into a Finnish newspaper… Do you have a link to the story?

The mental side could be tough, but that will just take practice as well. Anything is possible!

Thanks again,
Dan

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